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village idiot said:
Missus handed me my presents this morning, then asked, ''Where is the present you got for me?'' eerrmmmm, I've got nothing for you.

She says I do this every year and she fails to understand why? It doesn't matter how small the present is, it's the thought that counts. She claims. Well, I've not even open the presents she bought me
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you really dont understand wimmin,i had to take mine clothes shopping
 
to have to watch Downtown abbey .. max respect on that one !!! I couldn't,
I would rather watch Bradford City , (nah maybe not)
 
Tell me Im wrong but when you start a thread of your own it seems to me like its done for a reaction from others here. I seem to remember at least 3.
 
Reading your posts you seem obsessed with money and you paying for things. Regardless if your kids had presents or not, I'd still buy them something - my little girl got 6 presents but the fact it's Christmas and it's for kids every year!
 
I think you are making a mountain out of a mole hill. The thread was based on Christmas Arguments, PERIOD. And the fact everyone seems to be of the opinion that no arguments take place amongst spouses, friends, family etc at this time of year is plain nonsense.
How do you consider that I place money before love or caring?
Christmas is not for kids. Never has been. Christmas is a day to celebrate the birth of Christ. It is the likes of you who have made it a day to give presents to everyone and anyone you know. My wife asked me well in advance what present I will be getting her for Xmas, and also asked me what I will like? I told her I want nothing and will no be giving her anything. But to go along with the ''crowd'', I gave her Xmas shopping money. I also went out shopping with her on Xmas eve. Knowing that I was going to buy her nothing, she could just as easily have picked up what she wanted and placed in the trolley (she may well have done). I just moved around the various shops while she and kids pushed trolley and got whatever they got. I paid at the tills without questioning what was bought or why.

The point of my thread was that: there was no need for her to ask what I got her for Xmas as she knew I was getting her nothing. If you have to wait for Christmas to give presents to the ones you love (kids, wife, family), then you need to access your relationship with them. My wife's birthday is at the end of November. She got a lovely necklace, the price of which I will not mention. She keeps saying all her friends compliment her about the necklace. OK, time for someone to say it's all money related? Well, what is all this Xmas presents about? Is it not money related? Nothing to do with £ Wise men bearing gifts. How many of you went to church on Christmas day?

I have no friends, so had to post on Xmas day? So why did you bother responding?
I know where my wife was before we got married. I also know where she is at the moment. Better still, I know what will become of her should we go our separate ways. If we have any ''problems'', it is because she wants us to have them. You meet people, you get to know them and you accept them for what they are. She could do better but choose not to. How many of you get back home from a hard days work and then have to go into the kitchen and cook your own meal? Well?? I have accepted my lot. I choosed her, so can not complain. But she is the one who constantly seems to want more. Funnily enough, she could have more but I see no reason to give any more. As for moving out of the house, that is not going to happen. The house is mine and if she is not happy, the door is that way. As for counselling, I'm going no where to see no Shrink.
Show love throughout the year, not at Christmas.
 
You've hardly painted a good picture of yourself though, you've had similar reactions to all the other personal (ie unsure why they were even posted on a plumbing forum) threads you've started by various different people.

Your often ignorant, have no respect for your wife and blantently have no time for her, but expect your meals on the table when you walk in after a days work. Actually, that's not true, because you get meals made but they are not up to your standards so you cook yourself and then complain on having to do so.

You wear the trousers, your wife gets put in her spot when trying to make decisions.

You've obviously mis-understood the average relationship in the vast majority of cases. It sounds like neither of you have respect for each other or enjoy spending time with one another so until one of you can move away from the stalemate your at now you'll both be unhappy.

I've got first hand experience of relationship issues and I realised that if you really want to make it work you have to change yourself rather than be pig headed and expect her to change. A bit of give and you might get a bit back which is the start of making things work.

You have to ask yourself if you do really want it to work though or if your just to scared to be alone.

P.S I still think your tight.
 
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My missus is like a kid on Xmas day, she loves it, gifts, food the lot. It's a really special time for her and our family. I would be devastated to see her face if I hadn't bothered to get her anything. It's not all about the money either, I just think exchanging presents is a nice thing to do.

Imagine when your missus's friends ask her what she got? I'd be so embarrassed if it were me, but each to their own
 
Christmas Arguments: Does not say Christmas Argument. I simply started a thread about a conversation with my missus and the whole point was for others to share similar arguments on same day or make fun of it as they so please.

Words That Send shivers Down Your spine: Again was relating to comment(s) that my missus had made, and just wanted others to share experiences of words that sent shivers down their spine or words that they think can send shivers down ones spine.

In both cases, I was not asking for sympathy. My missus can and do go on a 'tanjent' more often than is necessary, but after 20 years, I know her enough not to bother about it. If she wants to walk, she is welcome to. She makes the comments, then says she is sorry. So in reality, it doesn't bother me that much. As for the counseling, if she wants to go, then it's up to her.

As for being tight, eerrrmmm, I'm surely not and do not consider money issues a must. If you want a good example, when pinklady asked me round to look at her bodged boiler job, she wanted to know if any other RGI could sort it and provide a Compliance Cert? If so, could I do it as she has lost fate in the fitters? I went to extremes encouraging her to keep communication lines with them open and to give them the opportunity to sort it out, failing which, I could help. If I was more interested in the money aspect, I would have jumped at the chance.

Today, we have been out visiting relatives. And for all the nieces, nephews, cousins, they each had £20 towards their Xmas present. It definately put a better smile on their faces than if I had gotten them a present they will end up binning. What will my missus say to her friends regarding present I got her? ''Nothing. He always gets me nothing, just gives me money and ask me to buy what is needed?'' So I'm not perturbed.
Someone mentioned earlier that I leave home early in the morning and do not return till late at night. WRONG: I drop my kids off to school on at least THREE days out of the five. Sometimes four days. And I also pick them up from after school play group at 5:45pm on at least three days a week. Sometimes all five days. I miss out on some work as the customer wants me there latest 8am, as they can leave me to it and bugger off to work. I tell them they will have to get someone else as my work times are: 10 am to 5 pm. Some custards come round and drop off the keys or tell me where to find it. Tight with money, NO, m8 not me.
 
Can we not just close this thread now. No more needs to be said. VI can do what makes him happy and we can do what we want. End of.
 
Christmas means many different thi gs too many different people in this day and age. Im an atheist pure and through but still respects other peoples religion and right to practice .

For me christmas is about goodwill to all men and women. Its not about money . I may have spent over 500 bar on the missus but the gift she loved the most was personalised coffee mug . Its the small things in life that mean the most
 
Moral of the story I suppose is don't bring stories of your personal life onto a public forum and expect a response that isn't anything to do with what you've written.

hope everyone enjoys the rest of the break, I'm enjoying spending some time with my daughter. It's not often I get too for the whole day, she's hard work at times but wish I'd made more time for it throughout the rest of the year, they grow up so fast.
 
we never worry whose paid for what although we have seperate bank accounts its usually a case of whose got the money at the time keeping a score on who paid for what is sharing a house not a marriage
 
village idiot said:
well, in as much as that is a true statement, I did inform her a very long time ago not to buy me anything for xmas. It's not my fault she did not listen. BTW, even the boys (7&9) got nothing from me, except my presence.
They will get plenty from the January sales, assuming one can trust it's actually a sale?
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Then your a tight git in my eyes
 
Nostrum said:
Moral of the story I suppose is don't bring stories of your personal life onto a public forum and expect a response that isn't anything to do with what you've written.

hope everyone enjoys the rest of the break, I'm enjoying spending some time with my daughter. It's not often I get too for the whole day, she's hard work at times but wish I'd made more time for it throughout the rest of the year, they grow up so fast.
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Moral of the story is that you do as you please in your household. As said earlier, I simply mentioned what missus said to me, and was not asking for sympathy. I need none. Someone claimed we are both miserable and seem not to like each other, so they see no reason why we should not just go our seperate ways? really? Just because a woman tells you you do not love her is no reason for you to conclude that she means it. Women are what they are. They say whatever they want to say when they feel like it. I brought my personal life, ffttt. What do you know about my personal life? She is my wife, and I've been married to her for 20 yrs. I know her well by now. If someone says ''my wife is horrible with directions'', so that translates into him hating his wife? There are a lot of women out there who cannot cook, clean etc. That is not to say they do not have a happy married life.
You want to buy presents for your loved ones over christmas, then good luck. I buy anytime of the year when I feel there is a need and not just because the shops want us to spend extra at christmas.
Have a HAPPY NEW YEAR. BTW, as for me and my household, believe you me, we are having a good time. Yesterday visited family, today visiting friends
 
It's always a good idea to share daft ideas with " friends " before putting them in action

( Some get their daft ideas from East Enders plot lines )

Sadly arguments , family Bickering , Showing up others by out Trumping their presents , alcohol fueled pettyness
seems to be a common theme for some at Xmax . ( My outlaws stayed away , and no one died this xmas - so I had a good xmas )
Enjoy if you can , ( or vent some steam -with it was only the Beer excuse )

Some of our purchases are waiting for sales !
 
Thought I'd revive this one just for you V.I! Did your boys get more than your presence this year?
 
Leo21 said:
You must be one bored bloke!
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I'm afraid he is not.
Bad news though is that they got naught. But truth of the matter is by the evening of Xmas day, I felt extremely embarrassed. Honestly.
I was first one up and went downstairs hitting the bottle & trolling UKPF. At around 8am, the youngest got up and started screaming: 'it's christmas, it's Christmas'. He woke his brother, then their mum and all came downstairs. Presents were pulled out from under the tree (by youngest son) and placed infront of everyone. Two presents were placed infront of me. I was then told to open one of my presents which I did.
Any way, to cut a long story short the two presents were from the boys. For the rest of the day, missus kept asking me: 'where is my presents? Only thing I got was from kids, where is one from you?' It got so bad I had to ask her to shut up (in absence of kids of course). Did she get me anything? NO. Besides, kids had asked me for money a week before Xmas so they can buy presents. So in a way, may be I bought the presents indirectly?
One thing is for sure though. Next year (if the good Lord spares my life), I'm going all out to satisfy everyone.
My MIL, who had been hinting all along to me that she wanted a slow cooking rice cooker got naught as well. Not even a visit? She hasn't spoken to me since? I will surprise them next year. You just wait & see.
 
Sounds like you`ve been touched by the spirit of Christmas and I for one am glad, what may I ask what was the one thing for such a drastic change of heart?
 
village idiot said:
I'm afraid he is not.
Bad news though is that they got naught. But truth of the matter is by the evening of Xmas day, I felt extremely embarrassed. Honestly.
I was first one up and went downstairs hitting the bottle & trolling UKPF. At around 8am, the youngest got up and started screaming: 'it's christmas, it's Christmas'. He woke his brother, then their mum and all came downstairs. Presents were pulled out from under the tree (by youngest son) and placed infront of everyone. Two presents were placed infront of me. I was then told to open one of my presents which I did.
Any way, to cut a long story short the two presents were from the boys. For the rest of the day, missus kept asking me: 'where is my presents? Only thing I got was from kids, where is one from you?' It got so bad I had to ask her to shut up (in absence of kids of course). Did she get me anything? NO. Besides, kids had asked me for money a week before Xmas so they can buy presents. So in a way, may be I bought the presents indirectly?
One thing is for sure though. Next year (if the good Lord spares my life), I'm going all out to satisfy everyone.
My MIL, who had been hinting all along to me that she wanted a slow cooking rice cooker got naught as well. Not even a visit? She hasn't spoken to me since? I will surprise them next year. You just wait & see.
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Good for you dude, even if you don't particularly agree with it. You have to play along for the families sake. A lesson I've well learnt, life is so much easier when you comply.
 
Leo21 said:
Good for you dude, even if you don't particularly agree with it. You have to play along for the families sake. A lesson I've well learnt, life is so much easier when you comply.
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Ahem to that Leo, anything (well almost anything) for an easy life.
 
rpm said:
Sounds like you`ve been touched by the spirit of Christmas and I for one am glad, what may I ask what was the one thing for such a drastic change of heart?
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Seeing the misery my wife seemed to be going through because she got no present from me. It made me hit the bottle even more. To make matters worse, she indicated that I got her nothing on our anniversary? Women. There's no pleasing them. I'll like to see the look on her face next year. In all earnest, I think I realy need to change. My SIL bought me a Work Radio last year, then gave missus a present to give me this year (haven't opened it yet?). I got her nothing all these years, but then again, I service her boilers for free
 
I hope you at least gave her a cuddle. They are free.
If you didn't go give her one :santa3:
 
village idiot said:
Seeing the misery my wife seemed to be going through because she got no present from me. It made me hit the bottle even more. To make matters worse, she indicated that I got her nothing on our anniversary? Women. There's no pleasing them. I'll like to see the look on her face next year. In all earnest, I think I realy need to change. My SIL bought me a Work Radio last year, then gave missus a present to give me this year (haven't opened it yet?). I got her nothing all these years, but then again, I service her boilers for free
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Me thinks you could still make amens by doing or giving them something special as a new year present(s). After all why wait another 12 months!!!
 
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