You never know what life is going to throw at you!

[cr0ft]

My wife and partner of 8.5 years has said she still loves me but needs space and has walked out to stay with her sis!

Feels ****ing awful. She feels she doesn't have her own identity.

The worst bit about being self-employed is not being able to pull a sick day sometimes! Not looking forward to work tomorrow!

 

[Billy Bob Bob]

jesus mate sorry to hear that

 

[Ray Stafford]

**** keiran, that's a b@stard. Hope it all works out ok.

 

[cr0ft]

Thanks guys.

 

[townfanjon]

Blimey mate thats a bugger. If you have posted this on here you are obviously very upset, why the hell cant you pull a 'sicky' I would , any decent customer would understand.

 

[cr0ft]

TBH it's weird but it's much easier chatting about it with people I have never met. Does that seem messed up?

 

[Nostrum]

Sorry to hear it Croft.

It wasn't the new shed was it?

Genuinely hope things work out for you. Customer come second in instances like this.

 

[Ermintrude]

Pretty poop thing to do. But give her some space , wait for her sister to call u ? Perhaps send some flowers for valentines but don't write loads?

 

[townfanjon]

TBH it's weird but it's much easier chatting about it with people I have never met. Does that seem messed up?

definitely not

 

[Dotty]

Bloody hell Keiran!

I know it hurts mate, don't make the mistake I did and turn to the bottle for support. Use your family, your friends and us to sound out on.

Being here for each other is one of the reasons we all log on.

 

[turnpin]

TBH it's weird but it's much easier chatting about it with people I have never met. Does that seem messed up?

No not at all after all a problem shared is a problem halved hope all works out ..best regards Turnpin

 

[Dotty]

TBH it's weird but it's much easier chatting about it with people I have never met. Does that seem messed up?

Not in the slightest. It's probably because we've never met you find it easier.

 

[julesverne]

shoot really feeling for ya . take the day off tomorrow make some bullshoot excuse just to gather yourself. Hope you can works things out.

 

[mutley racers]

That's real tough feller. I think ermni's advice is pretty good. Show her how much you care without too much pressure. I hope it comes good soon

 

[cr0ft]

To be honest it's a combination of me being, erm, quite a dominating personality and getting my own way a lot and her not feeling confident about shouting up about what she wants. Result = an angry wife that's exploded big style.

Mistakes on both sides I guess.

 

[gasmanrob]

Ouch. Nothing we can say or do will ease the blow of that.

If she loves you as she says then this maybe a good thing had she felt this way and not done anything or said anything she may have ended up resenting the relationship or worse you. Best she gets a bit of space and perspective on things.

chin up mate and don't forget you need a bit of space and time too working on a clouded mind is always counter productive. You think on things too much and end up snapping at the wrong people for the wrong things.

if you are clouded and confused take the day off. Sit in doors, go for a walk or whatever but just take time for you!!

 

[julesverne]

Not in the slightest. It's probably because we've never met you find it easier.

:iagree:

 

[IDCHAPPY]

B'ah, it's a dull blow mate. I presume there was no warning about it?
Take it easy if you can and see if she can give more explanation of where things are wrong.

 

[Destroyer2813]

Probably seems easier to talk to us as you get a unbiased opinion and no face to face awkward Ness. Seems tough mate just give her time don't hassle her to soon may make things worse good luck pal but I'd definitely be pulling a sickie if I fell I needed it

 

[cr0ft]

Ironically I've fallen out with my family defending her. My brother has autism but sometimes uses it to his advantage in social situations. My wife pulled him up on it and parents fell out with wife = I fell out with family.

Not a great combination!!

 

[cr0ft]

There was some warning, i.e. we've been arguing quite a bit recently over the most stupid things. Everything is easy to understand with hinsight of course.

She says she is going to come over on Tuesday night to chat about it all and she is still texting me so hopefully the time apart will make her realise it's worth fighting for.

I could be doing without 2nd fixing a rewire tomorrow, not the ideal job to have a clouded mind for really!!

 

[Ermintrude]

Take dogs out for a good walk, stop dwelling on it . And do as she asks then? Possibly just chill out ? As big bob once said don't worry.


Plus as a bit of an edit to an above post problem shared with the 300 or so arms members is a problem 1/299thed

 

[Destroyer2813]

When she comes over then try and air all your problems without getting into a confrontation and explain you'll make some adjustments as she should and go from there

 

[Ermintrude]

No getting depressed tomorrow and playing Russian roulette with rcds before u teste them with megger!

 

[gasmanrob]

When she comes over make sure you have vented that day!

As it will be all about your short comings in her eyes how you make her feel, take it on the chin and don't snap back.

we had a large bust up in the new year and I flew well off the rails baby gate through the front door the works. Worked through it but nearly lost everything in 15 seconds of red mist because it was all about my failings

 

[PlumbBobBob]

so sorry to hear this kieran, have a good nights sleep. things will be better in the morning i'm sure. i do hope you can sort it all out.

 

[cr0ft]

No getting depressed tomorrow and playing Russian roulette with rcds before u teste them with megger!

Even worse than that. I will be working in the house with a plasterer all day!!

 

[Masood]

Feel for you, Kieran. A hard thing to be confronted with but there are positives too - she's still talking to you, she still sees value in coming over to talk it through. Keep positive and as someone said earlier, just try and stay calm. You may well have all sorts of criticisms and accusations flung at you but don't take them to heart and react. It's not that they are absolute fact, it's how she perceives things at the moment. Keep strong mate, we're all here for you whatever you need to talk about.

 

[Masood]

Even worse than that. I will be working in the house with a plasterer all day!!

Well that's a good thing, you can vent all your frustration and anger at him. He's a spread, he deserves it...

 

[Toxic Ted]

Sorry to hear about it and as others have already said, share the load mate......thing might not seem so heavy in a couple of days especially as you are still talking....Chin up.