The new radiator

[Nicolas]

Nmf 2 last post bend it. 472 views 28 replies=5.9%

Oh to be a plumber!Your are at the trade counter, you've asked the spotty school leaver what type of pumps they stock and he thinks you've got a puncture . You've asked him for a 15mm fibre washer and he's said they don't sell white goods. You've struggled to get the boiler and cover up through a roof hatch that was designed for a dolls house. Even after all your efforts to cover up that old type fibre glass insulation is up your legs , up your sleeves, up your nose and it's a sweating 80deg

Your now home and browsing the forum. You're trying to think up a simple friendly answer to an enthusiastic diy er who's struggling with his English to even describe his problem let alone solve it. Sludge in the system, faulty three port valves, the pumps tripping the breaker ! Where will it end,

Relax , have a minute and read this, it happened to me I am ashamed to say
Knock knock, good morning Mrs. I am here to change that radiator. I step into a typical small semi detached hall. The stairs in front of me the door to the living room on my left and the wall behind the door with the radiator I am going to change, she wants a bigger one .
I have explained to her that the pipe centres will be wider and described the arrangement of elbow to accommodate it . She's happy with this and goes of to watch loose women.
There is a glass panel at the side of the door so plenty of light.Ok so the radiators now mounted firm and square on its brackets. I have cut and cleaned the pipes an they are held in position with the olive just nipped up, ready to solder.l put my heat shield at the back of the pipe and tackle the one at the bottom of the stairs first. I the move to the right hand one, the solders runs nicely I put the blow lamp down at the side of me whilst I apply the damp cloth to the joint.
Now net curtains don't burn they melt,she's smelt the smoke and is standing behind me. It's at this point that I know my credibility as a good plumber has gone, the recommendations have also gone with it, and I will be the topic of "guess what" to family and friends for weeks to come. So she's refused to pay me but I've negotiated a £50 discount to pay for new nets that are a quid a meter on the local market.
I've packed my tools and I am sat in my van,thinking well it could have been worse.
Then it hit me.
It started with a grin, then a smile, then a chuckle, then full blown uncontrollable laughter. I am laughing so much that I have tears in my eyes and can't see to drive. Ten minutes later she's wondering why I am still sat in my van outside her house.
Tell us your story.


Sent from my iPad


Sent from my iPad

 

[ShaunCorbs]

you never did the left hand one???????

 

[Ric2013]

He he!

 

[ShaunCorbs]

He he!

so that means you never filled up?

 

[Nicolas]

Shauncorbs. I did complete the job and filled up. The radiator worked ok but that did not reinstate my credibility. Thanks for your comments

 

[ShaunCorbs]

Shauncorbs. I did complete the job and filled up. The radiator worked ok but that did not reinstate my credibility. Thanks for your comments

so did you miss soldering the last elbow ?

 

[Nicolas]

Shauncorbs no I had completed the joint when I put the blow lamp down facing the curtains while I was concentrating on wiping the finished joint with a damp rag

 

[Meady]

What's the catch then?

 

[Nicolas]

To meady from nicolas there's no catch it's a true story

 

[lame plumber]

local lad went to our coxn's house where his Mrs is ultra house proud. He was moving a rad, set fire to the week old Laura Ashley made to measure curtains!!!!!!!!!!!!!
He never got the chance to finish off, I think he only just got away with his life pretty sure he got a bill as well

My worst error recently was to move a weird glass vase to get into a loo cistern, just caught the tip and it fell off!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Minor crisis, whipped out to the van, tube of supa glue to put it back on, stood there with the vase in hand as the owner wondered in and said oooh I will have that, dont want it broken, been passed down the family etc etc.................... I of course said nothing ............................... stood there in cold sweat for a bit, nothing further heard

 

[Nicolas]

To lame plumber from nicolas thanks at last a good tale. Don't tell me the rest of you have always got it right

 

[lame plumber]

they dont carry supa glue

 

[Rickster123]

I set light to a net curtain in a kitchen. They went up in a puff of smoke and vanished. Nobody even noticed! Not very house proud on that side of Lewisham.

 

[jonnyswamp]

Very nearly burnt a house down when some old hessian lagging caught whilst soldering under floorboards,there was an air vent through an external wall in the same joist gap as I was working in, which was handy !!! not
Managed to pull most of the burning lagging off, but the out of arms reach stuff was still going
Sheer panic and pure luck saved the day though and my half a cup of cold tea blindly threw in the general direction of the fire put out the last of the flames
I actually shook for a couple of minutes after that

 

[jonnyswamp]

Just remembered another fire related incident where 4 houses nearly went up
Sent the app outside to solder a couple of 90's on to the PRV pipe, which he duly did
However, it terminated tight to a dividing garden wall between the middle 2 house out of a terrace of 4
There was also a construction joint between the 2 houses that had a wide bead of mastic in it which didn't go all the way down due to the garden wall being built tight against it
As this expansion joint was only in the outside skin of brickwork, the polystyrene ball insulation was spilling out from the cavity, you can probably guess the rest but here goes anyway
The poly balls caught fire, not ablaze but smouldering none the less and filled the attic with acrid smelling smoke
In what seemed like a lifetime, I sent the app to the van to get a hose, turned off the cold main, pretty much flew back up into the attic and cut the cold feed that was still in place feeding the tanks, whipped on a ballofix connected hose to valve then fed the end of hose into the cavity
20 mins went by then had a very irrate neighbour complaining about water coming out of his extractor fan in his kitchen, I calmly explained that water was probably preferable to fire and to go back inside
After inspecting the cavity from the attic, we found that the smoke etc had got into the attic via a rat run that went top to bottom, creating a very effective chimney in the process
This job was for a HA, so informed them of what happened and why and never heard anything about it, though there was a site meeting because the rest of the estate was probably built the same

 

[Nicolas]

To johnyswamp from nicolas. Good story thanks. Generally we are a very professional lot and most of the time give a good service , but ever so often some little thing does go wrong.

 

[village idiot]

From Village Idiot to Nicolas. Only yesterday, I had to solder a drain off valve to a radiator that had been painted to extreme. So I whipped out a can of paint remover and sprayed the pipe a lot as the paint was quite thick. Without thinking, I then proceeded to solder another pipe below the radiator when out of no where, pooooffffff, whooosssshhhh. Panic as fire flew up everywhere. At that moment, I couldn't understand why? But after what seemed like forever, I put the fire out and ten minutes later realised what had caused the fire. Not clever, me.

 

[stevetheplumber]

ive done the vanishing net curtain trick, fell of the worktop and ripped tho open oven door of, cut a carpet with the skill saw, **** happens

 

[jonnyswamp]

ive done the vanishing net curtain trick, fell of the worktop and ripped tho open oven door of, cut a carpet with the skill saw, **** happens

Made I laugh did that

 

[Sparkgap]

You can get interesting stuff on commercial as well: had a fire once at a school, not due to our work but I was sorting out a contract on site when some yobbos torched the science lab prep room one weekend. Main hot water pipes ran through the ceiling back to the boiler room next door. The fire heated the pipes, water flashed to steam which shot back to the boiler room, 500 gallon hot water cylinder had its bottom blown out by the pressure and jumped three feet in the air hitting a 5" gas main. Poor firemen turned up to find a major fire, burning chemicals, a gas leak and water flooding out the boiler room!